Where to begin.....I woke up this morning to the sun shining brightly in my window which is amazing when you live in upstate New York and it has been winter for the past five months. I could hear the birds singing and there was Spring in the air. I felt such gratitude at the sounds and smells of this bright new day. I went about my morning doing my normal routine but there was a new awareness that felt really good. I would consider myself "awake" as I go through life but somehow making this committment to a bigger audience has created a deeper awareness for me. I love knowing there is another layer of love and gratitude to surrender to. I felt very excited about getting in the car and going in search of God however that might manifest. I had envisioned myself leaving the house between 10 and 11am. It turned out that 11 came and went and then 12 came and went and then 1pm came and went. I found myself getting caught up with phone calls and things that "needed" to be done and I started to feel impatient. What was going on .... I needed to go out and find God - oh yeah - God is everywhere - including my house. Silly me. I recognized this pretty quickly and reminded myself that something higher was at work creating all of these seeming interruptions so I just took a deep breath and knew that I would eventually get out the door. When the next phone call came I just thought to myself "God is calling." It was my friend Lisa and we made spontaneous arrangements to meet for a late lunch. Lisa is pictured above with my new daughter Lilly. Lisa was a sister of the heart from the moment I met her four years ago. Our friendship has deepened and expanded in countless ways and I am truly blessed to have her in my life. I was excited to spend time with her. We went to eat at a place that serves wonderful middle eastern food. The owner is a good friend of mine, he is from Syria and his falafel makes me want to cry it is so good. His food nourishes my soul every single time. Thank you dear friend. There was an older man who appeared to be from India sitting at the table next to us. He was wearing a bright yellow sweatsuit and was clearly developmentally disabled. He was bonding with Lilly and it was beautiful to witness the exchange of love between souls that required no words. While we were eating our friend Kris stopped by for a quick visit. Not long after an old friend I had not seen in over two years happened to walk by with her young daughter and ended up joining us. After our bellies were full we went for a walk in the cool air. We then "bumped" into our friend Jill and then an old classmate also named Lisa. It occurred to me later that those people were exactly who I was supposed to be photographing. Hey.... it's my first day on the job! It also occurred to me that had the day went according to my timing I would not have bumped into any of these people. God's timing, not mine??? I guess so. A good reminder to practice letting go of agendas and trust. We went to the bookstore for some tea. We refer to the bookstore as church. If you hear me say I am going to church that is code for Barnes and Noble. I often laugh if I get a call while at "church" and I will tell the person on the other line that I am at church and people nearby will give me a look like - "you liar" - pretty funny. After the bookstore I was headed home but decided to make a quick stop to fill Lilly's bottle up with milk. I even warmed it up in their microwave knowing that she falls sound asleep to a warm bottle. She sometimes gets fussy on the way home and it was close to bedtime. Thank God I did because just a few miles down the road something went wrong with my transmission and I found myself in the middle of four lanes of traffic and a car that would not budge. How do you get out of a car in the middle of this craziness? Especially in the dark with a baby. I decided the safest thing was to just stay put and I turned my four way flashers on. I wondered aloud how God might show up. No time like the present to TRUST! It was just a few minutes and a police officer came up behind me and helped me get the car in reverse and then I was able to get it into drive again. He gave me some advice on what to do if it happened again and sent me on my way. Thank you to all police officers who risk their lives for complete strangers every single day. He got out of his car in the dark in the middle of busy traffic to help me - sending him love as I write this. I wish I had a photo of him too. I drove another three or four miles and again I was stranded in the middle of a busy highway and my car would not move. I put the flashers on again and was able to slowly get onto the shoulder. I had the awareness that this was no accident in the midst of this potentially high stress situation. I was able to turn off the highway and get myself safely into a parking lot. From there I used my cell phone to get a ride home. While waiting for my ride I had a little private picnic with my left over falafel and baklava looking up at the stars and my sleeping baby and feeling deep, deep gratitude. I was feeling pretty happy that although I had tried to share that food earlier with our friend Kris that she had turned it down. Lilly was peacefully sleeping in the back seat thanks to the milk I had stopped to buy. When I did that I thought I was saving myself from listening to 20 minutes of fussing when in reality she would have been hungry and crying while I was stranded in the middle of the highway but instead she was blissfully unaware. My awareness to take pictures of all the ways God appeared in human form today was a little off the mark but my awareness of gratitude was amped up on full blast. Grateful for falafel (fresh and leftover), grateful for listening to my intuition for something as basic as a carton of milk, grateful for bumping into old friends, grateful for police officers, grateful to the person who thought up four way flashers, grateful to the people who went around me without beeping their horns, grateful for cell phones and parking lots and a safe ride home. I must confess that earlier today while trying to leave the house I found myself thinking that something grandiose needed to happen so I could start day one off with a big bang. I laugh at that now when the very purpose of this project is to show the presence of God in everything from a catepillar to the Grand Canyon. That right there is why many people think they are not having a direct experience of God. When we are waiting for the grandiose or the miracle we forget that it is already a miracle. The miracle is not just to be alive or to awaken but to stay awake. As Michael Beckwith says...."you are the miracle, you are the joy, you are the peace, you are the love. When you walk into a room you bring those things with you." So I am beyond happy to be tucked in with my jammies, my down comforter, my laptop, my candles lit and my baby sleeping by my side. Sweet dreams until tomorrow.
Love,
Kimberly
Quote of the Day:
"When you have learned how to decide with God, all decisions become as easy and as right as breathing. There is no effort, and you will be led as gently as if you were being carried down a quiet path to summer." Helen Schucman
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